If You Eat A "HamDog" (Hamburger/Hot Dog Combo) You Will Burn In Hell

At first glance, this may seem like a genius idea. “Oh wow, a whole new meat delivery system,” you’ll say. “Cheeseburgers and hot dogs? Well why didn’t I think of that?!”

Guess what? You didn’t think of it because it’s disgusting. Think of how many times you’ve been at a cookout and had a plate with both a cheeseburger and a hot dog on it. It’s happened so many times you’d need your fingers, toes, and pubes just to even sniff the ballpark and guess what? Never once have you considered combining those two things. You’ve mixed absolutely everything else on that plate into one giant pile of mush, thrown all the potatoes and macaroni and beans and vegetables into one, giant pig pile, but you’ve never put that hot dog on your burger. Why? Because you know it’s not the way god intended your meat to be consumed. In fact, I’m pretty sure that’s what Leviticus is about. “Don’t you fucking dare put that hot dog on that cheeseburger or I’ll smite you, you son of a bitch.” Or something like that, I only did three years of Catholic school.

The bible literally says this is wrong. It also says jerking off is wrong, and you do that, but you still just know this is wrong and it’s why you’ve never done it. The bible says don’t, but more importantly for your entire life your brain has said don’t. Listen to it. Don’t get tricked by fancy marketing now and eat something that people sat around and most certainly debated calling a Dog Burger. Be better than  that.

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